Yeah, so, I’m getting tired of people telling me how to use Facebook.
As far as I’m concerned there’s only one law on Facebook, and that’s Wheaton’s Law: Don’t be a dick.
Want to post photos of your kid, dog, cat, monkey all day? Go for it.
Do you like to share depressing stories about wars and/or abused animals? I bet you are super fun at parties.
You like to take quizzes that tell you what character from a ’90s sitcom you are? Knock yourself out.
Those ridiculous Tea Party bullshit articles and graphics with all the incorrect information that you like share? I will totally comment with a link to a Snopes article telling you that those are factually incorrect, but still, have a good time with that!
It’s your Facebook page. Just don’t be a dick.
If I don’t want to see what you are sharing, I won’t look at it. I might even hide you, and then check up on you later. You might hide me, because I post photos of my Spawn all the time, and my selfies are a cry for help. I get it. I take no offense. It’s your Facebook feed. Do with it what you will. Seriously, just don’t be a dick.
A few friends I’ve talked to recently mentioned that Facebook makes them depressed. “Everyone’s life looks so great, and mine isn’t” is something that someone, who is relatively new to Facebook, said to me.
Facebook is an illusion. It’s not real. Everyone looks great in their photos, because that photo is a selfie with an Instagram filter. And that’s fine. All the advertising/movies/TV shows in the entire world are trying to make us feel ugly. If someone wants to post a photo that makes them feel good about themselves for five minutes, let them have that!
Most of the statuses are funny and happy, because Facebook is a public place, and you want to put your best foot forward. Most of the time people are not sharing the bad stuff going on in their life. No one wants to be a Debbie Downer. As my clever sister Michelle said, “No one posts on Facebook, ‘I have hemorrhoids again – feeling uncomfortable.”
Does Facebook make you feel left out? My friends check in to cool places all the time, because they are cool, fun people. Sometimes I get that pang in my gut like, “They are all hanging out without me.” But then I remember not everyone can be invited to every single thing. Also, baby sitters are expensive. Also, I have a lot of stuff on the DVR that I want to watch. I go to places, and I don’t invite everyone. We’re cool, friends.
I love the website STFU Parents. I think it’s hilarious. It’s filled with parents who overshare and get judgey on Facebook. And while I think the site is funny as hell, I still think, “If they want to share photos of their kids shitting in the tub, well, that’s their business, I guess.” However, I reserve the right to laugh really hard at how assy they are. Still, it’s their Facebook page. However, mommyjacking is dick behavior.
Facebook is strange, new world, and everyone uses it differently. I use Facebook for work, but I mainly use it for fun. It’s a great way for me to have conversations with my friends. I look forward to seeing what they are talking about.
Sometimes my friends are talking about stuff that doesn’t interest me. I’m pretty sure my entire feed was about “Downton Abbey” when it kicked off its new season last month. I could care less about “Downton Abbey.” I used to watch it, but I broke up with it, because they introduced a character that was clearly the Cousin Oliver (or the Scrappy Doo, if you will) and that’s a sign that a show is running out of ideas, and I decided to jump ship now and watch other shows that are not out of ideas (Are you watching “True Detective?” You should be watching “True Detective.”). When everyone was talking about it, I remember thinking, “Ugh. Downton Abbey. Well, they will be onto something else tomorrow” and turning off my computer without comment. No big deal. I didn’t post a status saying, “UGH! I don’t care about Downton Abbey. Stop talking about it, you guys!” But if you want to post a status like that, then you should. However, I personally think it breaks Wheaton’s Law.
Oh, and here’s something else: Facebook is free! It’s free, you guys. Let’s keep the complaining about it to a minimum, before they start charging us. Facebook is a service that has allowed me to keep in touch with other friends that, let’s be honest, I may have not kept in touch with because life gets busy, and we all lose touch with people. It allows me to talk to my friends and family every day, and it has provided me with countless hours of entertainment, and IT’S FREE. That’s amazing to me.
Sure, Facebook probably sells my private information to other corporations and that’s the price I pay, but meh. My information isn’t that interesting. Trust me. We can be Facebook friends, and you can see for yourself. And yes, I realize I sound like a commercial for Facebook, and no, this post isn’t sponsored by Facebook. But if they wanted to kick me some money I would LIKE it. Get it? I would LIKE it. Ugh. Sorry for that.
Facebook is such a part of our lives now. It’s everywhere, and connected to everything. And yes, Facebook and its users can be frustrating at times, but honestly I get more frustrated with people who whine on Facebook about how other people use it. And I’m so over all of the articles telling me that it’s OK to post this, but not that, and don’t do that too many times, and you’re a jerk if you do this. It’s all good, you guys. Post whatever ridiculous stuff you want on Facebook, but remember other people can see it, and don’t be a dick.