Yeah, so, Margo and I never give, never surrender and talk about 1999’s “Galaxy Quest” on this week’s Dorking Out. This is one of her favorite comedies, and it was super fun to revisit it.
You can listen to it riiiight here or on Apple Podcasts, Google Play, Spotify and Stitcher.
Your assignment if you choose to accept it: Next week’s episode is 1992’s “Buffy the Vampire Slayer.” RIP Luke Perry.
Yeah, so, we have an Alexa in our house, but we don’t really use her that often.
She tells us when packages arrive, and occasionally I ask her to play music for me. I assume the rest of the time she’s monitoring our every word and reporting back to Amazon and/or the government. I don’t care because whoever is listening is bored AF.
“Ugh. They’re debating about what kind of delivery to get AGAIN. You ordered Chinese food the other day, assholes! What’s the debate about? You know you’re going to get Indian food. Just stop talking about it and order it already. … Here we go. She’s talking about her Weight Watchers Points again. For fuck’s sake! You’re going to eat the Indian food anyway, fatty! Oh good, now she’s lying to herself about how she’s going to yoga later tonight. Yeah, sure you are, honey. Go put on your eatin’ pants and slippers. You’re not going back out tonight.”
So, yeah, the other thing I’m using Alexa for is parenting.
It’s been raining like a lot in San Francisco, and every morning I get into this debate with my mighty, mighty good boy Calvin about wearing his raincoat.
Him: “It’s not going to rain.”
Me: “It is!”
Him: “No, it’s not. It’s not going to rain. I don’t need to wear that coat. I want my sweatshirt.”
Repeat five days a week for the entire winter season.
So, last week I got the brilliant idea to get Alexa to back me up.
Me: “It is going to rain. Ask Alexa! She will tell you.”
Him: “Alexa, is it going to rain today?”
Alexa: “The temperature is 45 degrees with showers expected today.”
Me: “See!”
Him: “I need my raincoat.”
Ta-dah! Calvin will listen to Alexa, but not me.
Now I’m going to get Alexa to start suggesting that he eat vegetables and pick up his dirty clothes. Pretty soon I won’t have to parent at all! Then I’ll spend even more time debating our delivery food options with David.
Yeah, so, this is super scary for the people that suffer from severe nut allergies.
Yeah, so, the Oscars are coming up soon, so Margo and I decided to dork out about one of the least popular Best Picture winners in recent years, “Crash,” starring Hollywood’s biggest stars AND Tony Danza.
We have a lot of thoughts and feelings about this one, including but not limited to “what the fuck,” “are you fuckin’ kidding me,” and “this is a bullshit movie.”
You can listen to us on DorkingOut.com and on Apple Podcasts, Google Play, Spotify and Stitcher.
Yeah, so, this week’s Dorking Out is a good one. Margo and I talk about 1989’s “Dead Poets Society,” starring Robin Williams, Ethan Hawke, Robert Sean Leonard and Josh Charles.
A few things about this rewatch …
Robert Sean Leonard was/still is super cute
This is a horror movie about a teacher that makes students read their poems in front of the class.
Yeah, so, my office husband John and I have a running commentary about people bringing dogs into grocery stores.
Look I love dogs (and cats and animals – you know I do), but unless they are service dogs or comfort dogs, they probably shouldn’t be in the grocery store.
John and I text every weekend about it.
Me: “I saw three dogs at Safeway.”
John: “I saw four dogs at Trader Joe’s.”
We also text about different flavor Oreos we find, but I’ll save that for another blog post.
On Sunday, David, Calvin and I went to Target. David was on the other side of store from me, when he texted: “Where are you? There’s a man walking a cat on a leash here.”
David came running up to me,” You need to get a photo for John.”
I think we might be taking this whole “pets in the store” thing too far, but at the same time, Target does have really good deals – and even cats like a good deal.
Yeah, so, a few weeks ago I did something I thought I’d never do.
No, I didn’t vote for a Republican.
No, I didn’t donate money to the NRA.
That’s disgusting. Get your mind out of the gutter.
I chaperoned a field trip for my mighty, mighty good boy Calvin’s school. The kindergarten classes were visiting the California Academy of Sciences, and the kindergarteners in Calvin’s special day class were invited to go, too.
Taking on the jellies.
I learned a few things on this field trip.
There were four kids to a group with one or two parents each. The students from the Special Day Class were divided into the groups, and each SDC student had their own dedicated chaperone (their parent or a special aide).
So, Calvin was in a group of three kids from the mainstream kindergarten class, and there was another parent chaperoning the group, too, which is good, because see the third bulletpoint.
Me talking to kids is pretty similar to me talking to adults. I ask them what movies or TV shows they are currently watching, and then I crap all over them. “My Little Pony? Ugh. Really? That shit is so 2015. Grow up!”
Actually, I usually tell them that I like something they’re wearing. “I like your cat ears headband.” “Cool Pokemon shirt. That’s a Pokemon, right? Oh, it’s Minecraft. Is there a difference?” And then I wrap up the stimulating conversation with something like, “I need to go stand over here now and do some serious adulting,” and then go lean against the wall and look at my phone.
I have no problem talking to Calvin. We talk about trains, trucks and buses. We recite lines of dialogue from “Daniel Tiger’s Neighborhood.” But other kids want to talk about their thoughts and feelings.
This became really obvious when we sat down to lunch. Our group is sitting at a table, and there is this awkward silence. No small feat considering it’s a table of 5 and 6 year olds, who normally can’t stop talking. Finally, the other parent, this really nice woman whose name I can’t remember because I’m an asshole, said, “Do you know any jokes?” And the kids started falling all over themselves to tell jokes.
It would have never occurred to me to ask that question. Calvin doesn’t tell jokes. He’s funny. He’s got a great sense of humor. But it’s not a “knock knock. Who’s there” humor. It’s more like, “I’m going to try to wear the dog as a hat” sense of humor. It’s “I’m going to refer to Mommy as Daddy” humor.
I would say the closest thing to a Calvin joke is this: He was in a bathtub, and he looked at me, crossed his eyes and said, “I’ve got two mommies.” I laughed really hard, which turned it into a thing. “Two daddies.” “Two Tobys.”
The other thing I noticed during the field trip: Every boy was wearing something superhero or “Star Wars” related. Shirts, jackets, shoes: All Iron Man, Captain America, Darth Vader, Spiderman, etc. Calvin doesn’t watch any of that stuff. He doesn’t even know who those people are. These kids probably don’t know Calvin is autistic. They probably think he’s Amish.
Yeah, so, this year hasn’t been awesome.
We have a sexual predator in the White House, and – with the help of an enabling GOP – he is attacking this country’s most vulnerable citizens, including the sick, elderly, disabled and immigrants. It’s disgusting and depressing as fuck. It fills me with rage.
I have donated money to organizations and candidates who are helping people and fighting for what’s right. I’ve been calling my reps, and occasionally reps in other districts since their votes affect me. I do what I can handle, and it makes me feel a little less helpless.
BUT, I wanted to focus on some good things that happened this year in the MansTracy household.
My mighty, mighty good boy Calvin started kindergarten, and he is flourishing. He’s so happy, and he’s learning so much. His language skills have improved by leaps and bounds.
I got a new job … kinda. The big corporate overload moved me from the Oakland office where I was the lone content person from the past 8 years to the San Francisco office to join the content team. And instead of just working on content for one brand, I will be working on the content with the team on all the brands. I’m really excited and nervous. Writing is in my comfort zone. Thinking big picture is outside my comfort zone. But, I’m down to expand my skillset. Plus, I super love being in the SF office. Not only has it cut my commute in half (and I’m taking BART instead of driving), but I absolutely adore my content coworkers. They are fuckin’ rad as hell.
I got on an airplane all by myself for the first time ever. True story. I met up with my mighty, mighty good man David in Portland after his work trip. We had a great time exploring the city, which is swimming in vegan options for me and beer for both of us. Plus, we got to see our friends Caitlin and Kirk, which made the trip even more awesome.
I got to go to Washington, DC to see my good buddy Katie and her husband Nathan. I finally got to see their house, and we spent some awesome time together walking around the Newseum, going to a Nationals game and sitting on the couch watching YouTube videos, because that’s how we roll.
We went to Santa Cruz again this year for our little family vacation, and we had an amazing time. Calvin has been asking to go back pretty much every day since we got back.
I started baking bread this year. I have always wanted to bake my own bread, but I thought it was too difficult and too time consuming. I found a perfect bread baking book: “Bread Illustrated” from America’s Test Kitchen.
My sister Michelle and my sister from another mister, Amanda, did a spa day at the Sonoma Mission Inn. We got massages and lounged by the pool with drinks. It was heaven.
I went to Bourbon & Branch for David’s birthday, and I discovered that I like gin. That’s a good thing.
My 15-year-old (!) niece Lorelei came out for the weekend, and we saw “IT” at the Alamo Drafthouse. Lorelei is a Tiny Sonia, so I knew she would love the Alamo Drafthouse. We had so much fun hanging out together. I was scared to see “IT.” I thought it was really fuck me up, but it turns out that I loved being scared about something other than the news.
After our weekend together, I went on a scary movie watching spree. It turns out I love horror movies! Funny enough, I’ve been listening to F This Movie for years, and the host Patrick Bromley is always taking about horror movies. Now I have the courage to actually watch all those movies he’s talking about.
Speaking of podcasts, Dorking Out with Chris & Sonia is still going strong. We recorded a podcast every week, except for one week. Even dorks need a week off once in a while. Super-big, mad props to my co-host Smith for keeping us on schedule, and all the work he does recording the podcast. Oh, and we got this amazing new logo by Jeff Heerman.
I’ll end this post with what everyone wants to see: Dog and cat cuddling action!
Happy New Year, you guys! Let’s hope that 2018 is chrome and shiny.
Yeah, so, we went on and on about “Star Wars: The Last Jedi” on Dorking Out with Chris & Sonia.
In episode 79, we review “The Last Jedi” with Raymond Scott Daigle, who used to work for Lucasfilm. I really loved the movie, even though I thought it was a little too long. I sing the praises of Mark Hamill, and mourn the loss of Carrie Fisher. Also, I think the Porgs are adorable, and I’ll fight anyone who says otherwise.
In episode 80, Scott sticks around for a State Of The Star Wars Galaxy discussion, in which we chat about all the upcoming “Star Wars” projects, including the Han Solo movie and “Star Wars: Episode 9.” Plus, Scott tries to convince us to watch “The Clone Wars” and “Star Wars Rebels.”
In episode 81, we talk about “Star Wars” stories we’d like to see. A Star Wars horror movie? A Star Wars romantic comedy? Why not? The podcast goes off the rails because, ummm, someone didn’t do their homework.
And finally, if you’re sick of “Star Wars” (whaaaaaaat?!), you might enjoy episode 82, our podcast in which we share some underappreciated family movies. It was a perfect opportunity for me to talk about “A Town Called Panic.”
The Sonia Show 