The Sonia Show

Writer. Mocker. Beer drinker. Old movie watcher. Mother. Goober.


Giraffe Day

Yeah, so, I fed a giraffe yesterday.

I don’t like to use the term “bucket list” because I’m not dying, so let’s just say that feeding a giraffe was on my list of things I’d really want to do (along with feeding penguins). Feeding penguins seems damn-near impossible to make happen – unless a plan a trip to Antarctic or the Galapagos Islandsand until they open a plush hotel near the penguins I’m not doing that. Feeding giraffes, it turns out, was pretty easy to make happen.

Everyone knows that Sunday was Father’s Day, but it was also World Giraffe Day. And, to celebrate World Giraffe Day, the Oakland Zoo was selling tickets to feed the giraffes. The tickets were $10. I bought them online. It was that easy. (FYI: In order to feed the giraffes at the San Francisco Zoo, you have to rent of one of their party spaces and invite like 80 of your closest friends and spend thousands of dollars.)

Mighty, mighty good man David is such a good sport. It was Father’s Day, and the day really should have been all about him and doing whatever he wanted to do, but he was willing to spend it doing something that was on my list of things to do. He’s a nice man. My brother-in-law Tony is a good sport, too, because he spent his Father’s Day at the zoo, too, with my sister and the girls. (Big thanks to the Mansfield-Hicks family and my mom for spending the afternoon with us at the zoo. Feeding the giraffes means something special to me, and I was so happy they were there.)

So, yeah, the giraffes were beautiful. They were so sweet and very gentle. They are amazing animals.




I was worried that Calvin wouldn’t be into it, or worse, be afraid of the giraffes. It was opposite. He was so excited. He ran up to them and immediately started feeding them. He wasn’t afraid of them at all. The Boy really loves animals.


You can’t see it, but Calvin has the biggest smile on his face.

In case you are wondering, I didn’t cry in front of the giraffes this time. Instead, I cried after where they couldn’t see me, so I wouldn’t be embarrassed.



Random thoughts about Miss Fisher, Daniel Tiger and more

Yeah, so, the countdown to finishing chemo continues … 10 more taxol treatments to go.

The side effects of taxol have been pretty minimal so far. My face and chest get flushed the day after. I feel a little rundown. I get really exhausted by the end of the day, but I’m having trouble sleeping. Go figure. Also, I’m getting hot flashes in the middle of the night. Wheee!  Still, taxol has been way more manageable then the AC treatment.

Oh, my hair is growing back! I’ve got some white peach fuzz on my head. Not gray. White. I have no idea if it’s going to stay that color, or if this white peach fuzz will fall out, too, but I’m happy it’s growing back. The color doesn’t matter. As soon as my hair is long enough I will dye it red anyway. In the meantime, my friend Sass has recommended I go for this look:


Maybe I could pull off the Bridgette Nielsen in “Beverly Hills Cop 2″ look.

So anyway, I finished the first two seasons of “Miss Fisher’s Murder Mysteries” that are on Netflix. Let me sum it up for you: It’s about a lady detective in 1920s Australia, and she solves murders. It’s kinda like “Murder She Wrote,” but the clothes are way cooler. The mysteries are not that difficult to figure out. The villains are always leaving pieces of paper with clues written on them. But I love the show. I love the cast, and I love the lead character’s clothes. They are gorgeous. I want her closet.


Season 3 is airing right now in Australia, and I will need to wait patiently for it to make its way to Netflix. I could buy the episodes on iTunes, but I’d rather spend my money on other shit I don’t really need like lipstick that just sits in my bathroom drawer after one use because the color isn’t what I thought it was going to be.

Speaking of TV shows, Calvin is really into “Daniel Tiger’s Neighborhood” right now. It’s fine. It’s not annoying like “Caillou.” It’s an animated show that is a spin-off of “Mister Roger’s Neighborhood” set in the Neighborhood of Make-Believe. The show has great messages for young kids: grownups come back, counting to four when you’re angry, stuff like that. When Calvin discovers a new show, he gets really into it and watches it over and over. That means I’ve watched it over and over, and I’ve noticed a two things.

  • Daniel Tiger wears a hoodie and shoes, but no pants. However, when he goes to bed he wears a full set of pajamas. Why does he need pants to go to bed? Shouldn’t he be wearing pants when he’s in public?
  • In Daniel Tiger’s home, they have tiger-striped curtains. WTF?! That would be like me having curtains made out of human skin.

The silence of the tigers: It puts the lotion in the basket or it gets the curtains again.

The silence of the tigers: It puts the lotion in the basket or it gets the curtains again.

So, one of the positives about chemotherapy is I’m off work until the end of August. And while chemo sucks, I am enjoying watching TV shows and movies that I normally wouldn’t have time to watch. I’m really glad I get to watch Jon Stewart’s victory lap on “The Daily Show.” If you didn’t see the episode with Stewart’s take on Donald Trump’s presidential run announcement and Pizza Hut’s gross new pizza, then I highly suggest you watch it. I laughed so hard I cried. I’m really going to miss Jon Stewart.

Last week I watched “Nightcrawler,” starring a super creepy Jake Gylenhaal. It’s a really good movie, but dark so consider yourself warned. This week I watched “Cabaret,” which surprisingly I have never seen. I enjoyed it. Liza Minnelli is pretty great in it, and I can see why she won the Best Actress Oscar. Her character is thisclose to being a manic pixie dream girl, but Minnelli’s performance makes her more than that. Joel Grey won Best Supporting Actor for his role as the MC, beating out James Caan, Robert Duvall and Al Pacino (!) for “The Godfather,” and that is absolutely ridiculous.

I am still working my way through all the “Star Wars” movies. You can read my random thoughts about “Phantom Menace,” “Attack of the Clones,” “Revenge of the Sith” and “Star Wars.” I will get to “The Empire Strikes Back” very soon.

I’m getting to end this post with a cute photo of The Boy eating ice cream because I can.



Revisiting Star Wars: A New Hope

Yeah, so, I made it through the “Star Wars” prequels. This means I now get to watch the original trilogy, which makes me really happy, because I love the original trilogy. Obviously.


Sadly, I don’t own the ORIGINAL original trilogy. I own the “special edition” trilogy with all the extra shit that George Lucas added. The movies didn’t need all the extra digital creatures and added scenes. The movies were great just the way they were. Like a lot of folks, I would prefer to watch the non-special editions, the versions I grew up watching, because I don’t like things messing with my memories, but I don’t have those, so special edition it is.

I haven’t sat down and watched “Star Wars: A New Hope” in a while. It’s been several years, for sure. I know that Spike TV airs the “Star Wars” movies on a loop, and occasionally I’ll leave it on for a few minutes and watch a little of whatever movie from the original trilogy they’re showing. but not often. I’m not one of those “Star Wars” nerds that watches the “Star Wars” movies all the time, or reads the books, or watches “The Clone Wars.” My “Star Wars” nerdom is at a well-adjusted level … I think.


I love the movies. I have watched them countless times. I quote them. (“No reward is worth this” – something I say at work quite often.) I have a “Star Wars” ringtone.  I have a framed “Star Wars” poster and random “Star Wars” statues and action figures throughout my house. I’m definitely a “Star Wars” goober.

My old hair with Darth Vader, because why not?

So anyway, it’s time to watch “A New Hope,” which is the movie that spawned my first real movie star crush on Han Solo.

  • That entrance by Darth Vader: It’s like a rock star entrance. “Hello people of Alderran! Are you ready to rock?” I remember being so frightened by Darth Vader as a kid. Little did I know that he’s just a burn victim with a broken heart.
  • When Princess Leia is first brought before Darth Vader, doesn’t he know that she is his daughter? Wouldn’t the Force tell him that or something?
  • Oh, sorry. Spoiler alert! Princess Leia and Luke are Darth Vaders’ kids.
  • One of the things that works so well in “Star Wars” is, unlike the prequels, we can relate to Luke. He is as close as we get to an everyman in this movie, so other characters explain things such as the Force or hyperspace to him, but they are really describing it to us. It’s helpful. We could have used a character like that in the prequels.
  • Han Solo is such a dreamy scoundrel.
  • I wrote about my feelings on Han Solo shooting first riiight here. Short version: It’s bullshit, and it makes me angry. George Lucas had it right the first time, and he shouldn’t have changed it.


  • I don’t like the added scene with Jabba the Hutt either. I always thought it was cool that we didn’t see Jabba until “Return of the Jedi.” He had been mentioned in the earlier films, and I remember thinking it was exciting that we finally got to see him in “Return of the Jedi.” Plus, in the added scene Han steps on him. WTF? Wouldn’t Jabba have him killed on the spot for such a thing?
  • Carrie Fisher is so beautiful, and she’s a kickass Princess Leia.
  • “Kid, I’ve flown from one side of this galaxy to the other. I’ve seen a lot of strange stuff, but I’ve never seen anything to make me believe there’s one all-powerful Force controlling everything. There’s no mystical energy field that controls my destiny. It’s all a lot of simple tricks and nonsense.” – Han Solo with one of the best lines of dialogue ever, in my opinion.
  • There is already an emotional weight behind the lightsaber fight between Darth Vader and Obi-Wan Kenobi, but there is a lot more when you’ve seen the prequels. What’s great about that scene is it’s just a sword fight. The prequel lightsaber fights are all crazy choreography but none of the emotion – at least not until the final battle in “Revenge of the Sith.”
  • Why doesn’t Chewbacca get a medal at the end of the movie? Racism!


  • If I was in galaxy far, far away, I’d like to think that I’d be brave and awesome like Luke, Leia or Han Solo, but the truth is I’m C-3PO. I’m such a C-3PO.
  • “Star Wars” is so fun and so well done that it’s difficult to believe that George Lucas wrote and directed it.

Want more “Star Wars?” You can read my thoughts about “Phantom Menace,” “Attack of the Clones” and “Revenge of the Sith.” Up next: One of my all-time favorite movies, “The Empire Strikes Back.”


I probably should stop buying wigs now

Yeah, so, one down, 11 more to go.

I had my first weekly taxol infusion on Friday. I was really anxious about starting taxol, even though all the doctors kept telling me that taxol is much easier to deal with than the AC I’ve been doing since March. The thing with taxol is some people have an allergic reaction to it. You get all red, your chest feels heavy, and your throat closes up. Sounds super scary, right? I knew the nurses would watch me closely for my first injection, and they would step right in if I had a reaction, but the idea of having the reaction at all gave me incredible anxiety.

I had more anxiety sitting in the chemo chair on Friday then I had the first time I did chemo. I was able to keep my anxiety under control … a little. I started crying, and I got a slight rash on my arms and legs, which I am now convinced are anxiety related. I got the same thing in the hospital when I had a fever and freaked out, and it went away after I calmed down. The nurse gave me Benadryl before the taxol, just in case there was a reaction, but there was no reaction.

In fact, not much happened at all. I was just loopy from Benadryl. After my infusion, I went home, had a piece of toast, took some Zofran (just in case), and slept for four hours. On Saturday, my face and chest were flushed. I was red, like I’d been in the sun, but by Sunday it was gone. And now, other than feeling a little rundown, I feel pretty OK. Other side effects might be coming, including losing my sense of taste and bone pain, but so far, so good. Of course, I’ve only had one dose. I suspect those side effects will come after a few doses, but I’m trying not to think about that right now.

So, that’s the chemo update. What else should we talk about?

Oh, I got a new wig. I know, I know. I have too many wigs now. Including the green, orange and red wig I bought, I have a total of seven wigs. Maybe I have a wig-buying problem. The first step is admitting you have a problem … But I wanted a cool summer look, so I decided to get just one more wig.

Red with blond streaks: What do you think?

Red with blond streaks: What do you think?


Revisiting Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith

Yeah, so, I’m continuing my journey through all the “Star Wars” movies. I watched “Phantom Menace” and “Attack of the Clones” earlier this week. And now I turn my attention to “Revenge of the Sith.”


I saw ‘Revenge of the Sith” twice in theater in 2005. There were definitely parts that I thought were pretty cool, and I remember liking it, but I still never bothered to watch it again on DVD. It’s certainly a better movie than “Attack of the Clones,” but “Revenge of the Sith” is far from perfect. It lacks some of the fun of the original trilogy. It’s darker, but maybe it needs to be since it is about a man turning evil and all that.

Once again, here are my random thoughts while revisiting “Revenge of the Sith” this time around.

  • I still feel that we are told over and over that Anakin Skywalker is a powerful jedi – maybe the most powerful jedi ever – but we’re not shown that he is a more powerful jedi than Obi-Wan Kenobi. Obi-Wan Kenobi kicks some serious ass in this movie. He seems more powerful than Anakin to me.
  • Ewan McGregor as Obi-Wan is still dreamy. I’d totally hit that if only Jedis were allowed to love.
  • General Grievous has a nasty cough. Don’t they have Robitussin in a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away?
  • “You are so beautiful.” “That’s only because I’m so in love with you.” “No, it’s because I’m so in love you.” Ugh. George Lucas is a terrible writer. “No. You’re the schmoopy.” “No, you’re the schmoopy!”
  • Just like the other prequels, the dialogue is awkward and delivered flat by the actors. Yoda is the most animated, and that’s probably because he’s animated. You know you’re a shitty director when you make Samuel L. Jackson boring.


  • Beauty tip: The Dark Side makes you ugly.


  • Anakin going into the Jedi Temple and slaughtering all the jedi is a really gruesome scene, especially the killing of little kids.  That’s some serious Dark Side shit right there. I am thankful that George Lucas cutaway and doesn’t actually show Anakin killing little kids. It’s bad enough that we have to see their little dead bodies later in the film. For once, Lucas made a good directing decision.
  • Watching the murders of the jedi, including the children, is terribly sad. It’s probably the most emotional sequence in all of the prequels. I feel like the prequels are so cold and hold us at arms length, but this sequence made me the feel something, and that something is sadness that all the jedi are dead and anger directed at Anakin.
  • The final fight between Anakin and Obi-Wan gets a little too video gamey. However, Ewan McGregor is such a great actor he really sells the emotion behind the fight. Hayden Christensen, not so much. I would say it’s fucked up that Obi-Wan just left Anakin there to burn alive, but yeah, fuck that guy, he killed those young kids. I’d leave him there to burn alive, too.
  • Padme was fine, medically, but she lost the will to live. She’s died of a broken heart, you guys.
  • And, of course, there is this, which is pretty much the worst thing ever.


I remember laughing out loud during this scene while watching in the movie theater. It is not supposed to be funny. It’s supposed to be a very serious scene. Anakin has found out the love of his life is dead, and now he is Darth Vader and turned to the Dark Side for nothing. Wah wah. If George Lucas had just ended that scene right after the full-on Darth Vader reveal, instead of with the Noooooooooo! it would have been much better ending.

Up next: One of my all-time favorite movies, “Star Wars.”


Revisiting Star Wars: Attack of the Clones

Yeah, so, in my ongoing quest to revisit all the “Star Wars” movies I watched “Attack of the Clones.”


Out of the three prequels, “Attack of the Clones” is the one I remember liking the least when I saw it in theater. I saw it only one time and never watched it again until today. I remember being incredibly bored. That’s pretty much how I felt this time, too.

After watching “Phantom Menace” yesterday, I tried to remember anything about “Attack of the Clones,” and I really couldn’t remember one exciting sequence. All I could remember about it is that Anakin and Padme hook up in it, and that never quite worked for me.

While watching”Attack of the Clones,” I wrote down all my thoughts into this handy list.

  • Why can’t Yoda tell that Palpatine is Darth Sidious? Maybe that is explained in “Revenge of the Sith” and I don’t remember.
  • “I hate it when he does that.” Ugh, the banter between Anakin Skywalker and Obi-Wan Kenobi in the opening action sequence is dreadful.
  • I like Ewan McGregor. Even with a beard, he’s dreamy.
  • Anakin went from a sweet young boy in “Phantom Menace” to a whiny jerk in “Attack of the Clones,” stomping his feet and shouting “It’s not fair” throughout the movie.
  • Why does Padme fall in love with him? Anakin seems like a creep who comes on too strong. Plus, she’s maybe 28 or 29, and he’s 18 or 19. So there’s an age difference, and he’s a bit creepy: What a catch, Padme! You know, a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away, they probably had JDate, but the J stands for Jedi. She probably could have met a nice Jedi who doesn’t try to murder their grown children. Maybe Padme is into Anakin because she’s in her 20s and we all make bad romantic decisions in our 20s. Luckily for us, our poor romantic choices don’t lead to the destruction of entire planets.
  • Anakin and Padme literally roll around in a field of flowers together. Ewww.
  • Padme finally decides to be with Anakin after he slaughters a village of Tusken Raiders that killed his mom. Ewww again.
  • Also, why does Anakin wait 10 years to go back for his mother? That seems like an awful long time to let your mom be a slave.
  • Padme’s conveniently ripped shirt in the fight sequence.
  • padme-shirtI did like seeing all the jedis fighting in the big battle against the droids, and I like the duel between Count Dooku and Yoda. Mighty, mighty good man David hates the fight sequence between Dooku and Yoda. He would prefer Yoda use his mind over a lightsaber to fight, but I still enjoyed seeing Yoda in action.


  • Sure. Why shouldn’t we get to meet Boba Fett as a kid? [sigh] It’s fun to take the mystery out of interesting characters from the original trilogy. I mean, why just ruin Darth Vader when we can ruin Boba Fett, too, right?
  • Hey, at least there’s barely any Jar Jar Binks in “Attack of the Clones.” That’s pretty cool.

There is no sense of fun in “Attack of the Clones.” Say what you will about “Phantom Menace,” but at least it had a fun pod race. “Attack of the Clones” is very serious, and when it’s not being serious, it’s serving as a lame, awkward love story.

Up next: “Revenge of the Sith.”



Revisiting Star Wars: Phantom Menace

Yeah, so, since I have a little time on my hands these days (thanks, chemotherapy) I’ve decided to re-watch all the “Star Wars” movies.

As you all know, the original trilogy is my favorite, but I haven’t seen the prequels since I saw them in the theater. Perhaps that makes me a bad “Star Wars” fan, but overall I was disappointed in the prequels, and I didn’t care to revisit them. But, with the new “Star Wars” movie coming out in December, I decided now is good time to revisit all the movies.

There is a lot of debate out there on which order the movies should be watched: theatrical order or chronological order. Some people recommend watching them in the “machete order,” which is Episode 4, 5 followed by 2 and 3, ending with Episode 6 (and skipping “Phantom Menace” completely). If I was playing these movies to my son, I would show them in theatrical release order – Episode 4, 5, 6, 1, 2, 3. Obviously, I’ve seen all the movies, and I have decided to watch them in chronological order.

This blog post is the first in a series about my experience revisiting the “Star Wars” movies. If that’s too geeky for you, well, I’m surprised you were reading this blog in the first place.

So, let’s start with “Phantom Menace.”

I saw “Phantom Menace” in the theater three times in 1999, and I haven’t seen it since. I remember really wanting to love it. I didn’t. I always tried to focus on the parts of the movie I enjoyed (Qui-Gon Jinn, Darth Maul), and I tried to forget the parts I hated (midichlorians, Jar Jar Binks).

This time around, I enjoyed the movie more, probably because my expectations were pretty low. The film is still flawed. The story is a bit of a yawn (trade blockades – wheee!) The dialogue is awkward (“Are you an angel?”). And some of the performances are flat (Natalie Portman talks like a droid throughout most of the film). The idea of midichlorians is stupid as hell. And, Jar Jar Binks is still terrible – really, really terrible. I’m embarrassed for the film whenever he is on screen.


I know people hate the pod race. It’s an unnecessary action scene, and it makes the movie longer than it needs to be, but I still think the pod race is kinda exciting. I liked Liam Neeson as Qui-Gon Jinn even more this time. What a bummer they killed him off in this movie. I would have liked to see more of him, but I understand that they had to set up Obi-Wan Kenobi training Anakin Skywalker in the future films. And, oh yes, Anakin, aka Annie. He wasn’t my favorite when I first saw the movie, but now … I kinda like him. However, in “Phantom Menace,” Anakin is a sweet little boy, and it’s difficult to believe he’s going to grow up to become Darth Vader. There’s nothing dark about him. He’s a good kid. I know that the actor Jake Lloyd was loathed by “Star Wars” fans, but I think he’s performance is fine. It’s not complete garbage. It’s possible that being the mother of a young boy has softened me. Also, knowing what I know about the future movies, it’s creepy that Anakin and Amidala get together. In “Phantom Menace” there’s a 10-year age difference, and they have more of a brother-sister vibe, so their eventual hook up is kinda gross to me.

Of course, the coolest thing in “Phantom Menace” is Darth Maul. He was such a badass character that they just wasted in this movie. They gave him one kick ass fight scene with Jinn and Kenobi and then cut him in half. The end. What a missed opportunity. He would have been a great character to keep around for just a little bit longer.


At first the slow pacing and the introduction of Jar Jar had me wondering if I had the patience to make it through the entire movie, but once it got going, I was entertained by “Phantom Menace.” Like I said, I think low expectations worked in its favor. I didn’t love it, and it is nowhere near as good as the movies in the original trilogy.

Up next is “Attack of the Clones.”

Have you revisited the “Star Wars” movies recently? What did you think of “Phantom Menace?”



Five Guys, Sunday brunch and a zoo

Yeah, so, it’s been almost two weeks since I last blogged. My apologies.

Here’s the update: I completed the final round of AC, so I’m going to be all about the taxol for 12 weekly doses starting June 5. Jealous? I sure hope not.

This final round wasn’t an easier. I do chemo on Friday, and usually by Monday I am able to taper off some of the anti-nausea meds. By Tuesday, I’m down to just taking the occasional zofran.

This time around, I had that queasy feeling well into Wednesday, and that’s with acupuncture on Monday and Wednesday. On Wednesday, we took the acupuncture to the next level. In the past, the needles have been in my feet and calves, but due to the lingering queasy feeling, he put needles in my hands, too. That meant for 25 minutes I really had to just lie there. No screwing around on my phone. No reading some lame fashion magazine. It’s relaxing, but we do the acupuncture in the infusion center, which is the same area I receive chemo. I can hear talking and machines beeping. It reminds me chemo, and thinking about chemo makes me feel queasy. It’s hard to tune it all out. I wish it was more of a spa-like setting. Of course, I wish everything was a spa-like setting. The world would be a better place.

Other than that lingering queasiness that is now gone, this round has been uneventful, and we like uneventful. Mighty, mighty good man David is traveling for work this week, so I’m glad that I’m feeling relatively normal.

OK, enough chemo talk … We had a nice three-day weekend. On Saturday, we went to Concord to see the family. We hardly ever try to eat in restaurants with The Kid anymore, because it’s just too unpredictable. The Kid might sit down and eat, or he might wander around the restaurant, and one of us (usually David) will end up walking around the restaurant and then scarfing down cold food. This time around we had a successful lunch at Five Guys in Concord. Calvin loved it there, and we were all able to sit down and eat like normal human beings. It was pretty cool.

Lunch time.

Lunch time.

Whenever we try to bring Calvin to a restaurant in San Francisco, I feel like we get dirty looks.

“Oh great. They brought their kid.” [sigh]

It makes me feel like a dick. One of the good things about the burbs, they expect you to bring a kid, so it ain’t no thang. Calvin did really awesome and sat at the table and ate his lunch. But at one point he got out of the chair, and basically did a downward-facing dog next to the table for no reason. People didn’t even notice. There was music playing, too, so a few times The Kid got up and started dancing. Once again, people seemed totally fine with that. Of course, Calvin is a pretty good dancer, so obviously people would be cool with it.

On Sunday, we had brunch at our new friends’ house. They live just up the hill from us in a really cool place. They live in a grownup house with nice things. We’re renters with a “Star Wars” poster on the wall. HA!

Brunching buddies.

Brunching buddies.

We met our new friends, Lucy and Richard, through Calvin. Our kid and their son Albert met at preschool, and they are best buddies. Lucy and Richard were kind enough to invite us over for Sunday brunch, and we were nice enough to trash their lovely home for four hours. Aww new friendship! Next time, they can trash our place. It’s only fair.

On Monday, we went to the zoo, because that’s pretty much what we do every weekend now.

“Oh, you again.” – all the animals.

As usual, we followed Calvin’s lead throughout the zoo and did whatever he wanted. He spent some time chasing seagulls in the playground. He also discovered that the men’s restroom has a fan, and that’s pretty exciting. We stopped by the carousel. Calvin likes to look at it, but he never wants to get on it. This time, he actually stood in line and said he wanted to try it, but he chickened out. He’s getting closer to actually getting on it, though. #progress



We had a great time at the zoo, and I think Calvin wore himself out – just a little bit.

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You give me fever, too

Yeah, so, tomorrow is chemo day, so I’m getting that overall sense dread that I always get the day before. It sucks.

I’m pleased that this will be the last of the AC part of the ACT. I have been told repeatedly that the T is easier to deal with, so … good times, I guess? I have 12 weekly doses of taxol, so I hope that’s true. The AC certainly hasn’t been awesome. Along with nausea (which I’ve been able to manage pretty well with the meds and acupuncture), hair loss, and the constant battle between constipation and diarrhea, one of the side effects I’ve been struggling the most with is the low white blood cell count.

Even though I give myself shots to boost my white blood cell count, I’m still battling germs, because I’m so afraid I’m going to end up in the hospital again. I actually limit my time out and about because I’m so paranoid. To me, everything is a germ factory … including my kid.

Calvin got a cough and a fever. Obviously, I wanted to comfort him and mother him, but I had to keep my distance. Mighty, mighty good man David snuggled with him in his bed, and I lingered outside the door. “Are you guys OK in there?” “We’re fine. Try to stay away,” David replied.

I didn’t do very well at staying away. Or, I should say Calvin didn’t do very well at staying away from me. As soon as David wasn’t looking, Calvin would be all over me and sticking his face in my face and breathing all over me. I knew I was doomed, and I was right. A cough and a fever is an interesting choice for a Mother’s Day gift. I would prefer flowers.

I infected you! Ha ha!

I infected you! Ha ha!

On Friday, I developed a nasty cough and a fever of 100.5. I’m not supposed to call Kaiser unless it hits 101. So, all day my fever sat at 100.5, taunting me. I started to worry that the fever would climb in the middle night. I didn’t want to wake up David and the kid, and make David drive me to the ER. I really didn’t want to take a cab and go to the hospital alone, either. Finally, I broke down and called in the early evening, and the doctor said that 100.5 was close enough to 101, so I should come into the ER.

My sister Michelle drove all the way from Concord to take me. She’s good people. We spent the evening chatting it up in the ER while they took my blood, gave me an IV to hydrate me, and I tried to mentally prepare myself for another hospital stay. Of course, once I got to the ER, the fever went away. Fevers are such dicks. My blood work showed that my white blood count was fine. I was so relieved when they sent me home.

The fever came back the next day, but it sat at 100.5 again all day long. I went to bed early, and the fever broke at some point in the middle of the night, because I woke up soaking wet from sweat. The fever is gone, but the cough remains. I’ve laid low all week in the hopes I can get rid of the cough before tomorrow. Dealing with chemo nausea with a cough doesn’t sound awesome to me.

Before I got the cough and fever, I tried to pretend I was a normal person and went to the movies. It’s the first time I’ve seen a movie in the theater since THE SECOND “Hobbit” movie. That’s right. The girl who used to see all the movies hadn’t seen a movie in the theater in more than a year. Oh, the humanity.

So, what movie finally got me into an actual movie theater? Good buddy Kate scored tickets to a special screening on Amy Schumer’s “Trainwreck.” It doesn’t open in theaters until July, so it’s OK to be jealous. Immediately after seeing it, I posted my review on Twitter.


I stand by that review. I laughed out loud a lot. I highly recommend it. I do not think you will be disappointed.

I really miss going to the movie theater to see movies. I played my chemo card and convinced Kate to wait and watch “Pitch Perfect 2″ with me. It opens tomorrow, but obviously I won’t be able to go to the theater for maybe more than a week or so. Yes, yes. Go ahead and laugh. I really liked “Pitch Perfect,” and I want to see “Pitch Perfect 2.” I’m not made of stone, people.




Yeah, so, having a 3-year-old means you always need to be prepared.

Even for a short car ride, I need a toy truck, a cup of water and a cracker. If for some reason I forget one of those things, that will be the time that he asks for one of those things. When I say I don’t have it, then there will be a tears, because he’s 3.

Three year olds are like bitchy teenagers or entitled, demanding celebrities with a pre-show rider that includes a dressing room filled with exactly 17 vanilla candles, a yellow bowl of blue M&Ms and four peacock feathers hanging from the ceiling or they will refuse to go on stage.

The other day I picked Calvin up from preschool. He climbed into his car seat, and he was happy as can be when I strapped him in. He had a toy truck and his graham cracker. I got into the front seat to head home, when he asked for “water, please.” He actually said please. True story.

“Oh, I’m sorry, honey. I forgot your water. I’ll get you a cup of water as soon as we get home, I promise,” I said.

Then the tears started. Ugh.

“I understand you. I understand you want water,” I told him. “I’m sorry, honey. It will be just a few minutes.”

Then a toy truck hit me in the hand. I turned around to look at him.

“Sorry, truck,” he said.


Threenagers, am I right, folks?

Mighty, mighty good man David thinks by saying “Sorry, truck” Calvin is actually saying, “Sorry about the truck,” and he’s apologizing to me. I, however, am not so sure. I think he was saying sorry to the truck.

You will meet my demands or else.

You will meet my demands or else.




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