Yeah, so, David and I decided to take the ferry to Sausalito yesterday … which reminds me of the time I took the ferry to Shelbyville. I tied a turnip to my belt, which was the style at the time …
Sorry, I turned into Grandpa Simpson there for a second.
So anyway, I had never taken the ferry before. It was one of those things on my “San Francisco To-Do List,” so we decided to finally make it happen.
I loved taking the ferry. I love being out on the water. Sadly, I get sea sick, so a ride on any boat smaller than the ferry on the bay would be tragic for me.
The minute we stepped off the ferry at Sausalito, we were approached by a man with postcards trying to promote his art gallery. He ended up only talking to David, because I saw this and left them both standing there:
Now, that is art, my friends. Come on! Yes, I’m sure you worked really hard on your paintings, sir, but look, that wiener dog is wearing sunglasses!
That man and his wiener dog were probably my favorite thing in Sausalito. I’m sure it’s a nice, little city, but we quickly discovered that other than overpriced eating and drinking there isn’t much to do there … Not that there’s anything wrong with that.
Also, the whole town smells like waffle cones.
We had a nice lunch, though, and wandered into the different shops, where I stumbled upon this disturbing T-shirt:
Friends have told me that this is supposed to be a joke shirt, a play on the “I heart SF” shirts. For some reason, I was annoyed by this shirt. Sausalito isn’t nearly as cool as SF. It should worship SF. SF is like an amazing woman, and Sausalito is like a man that isn’t good enough for her. How dare Sausalito not heart SF! I’m going to make a T-shirt that says, “I’m just not that into you, Sausalito.” So there.
I am easily distracted, though, and my annoyance was quickly forgotten when I saw this:
I had no idea there was Jane Austen action figure. I’m going to get an Emily Bronte action figure and make them fight.
Eventually, the overpowering waffle cone smell was too much for us, and we took the second to last ferry back to our beloved SF, which we totally heart by the way. We sat in the front of the ferry so we could enjoy the awesome view of the bay, but I spent the entire ride starring at this woman’s mullet. Unfortunately, I didn’t have the balls to try to take a picture of her. There I am, on a mother-flipping boat with an amazing view of San Francisco, and I can’t take my eyes off this mom in her jean, letterman-style jacket and mullet. I’m such an asshole.