Dear Emeryville Parking Center,
Yeah, so, just a heads up that I’m not going to pay the parking ticket that I received this afternoon.
No, seriously, I’m not going to pay it. I’m not going to pay it for the following reasons:
1. It’s bullshit.
2. See #1.
I went to afternoon yoga like I always do. I come back to my car and there’s a ticket on it. Well, Namaste to you, too, motherfuckers! I saw the ticket, read the ticket, and I still had no idea why I got the ticket. I started looking around. Then a woman cruised by and said, “You’re not supposed to park there. You can’t park between the two signs.”
“What two signs?” I asked.
“Behind those trees,” she said. “They’re new.”
I had to hunt to find these signs. Tell me, can you see the signs?
You put the no parking signs behind trees?! WTF, Emeryville! I know that times are tough, and cities need money … but you are not getting mine! Maybe you can pull that shit on Pixar employees, but you can’t pull that shit on me. I live in San Francisco. I fight parking tickets a daily basis! You don’t know who you are messin’ with.
Here’s a picture of my parked car.
Please take note that the curbs are not marked. Yep, the curb is unmarked, and the signs are hidden. Well played, Emeryville. But I’m still not paying this ticket!
The Sonia Show
P.S.: Why does the Emeryville Parking Center have a P.O. Box in San Ramon?