Yeah, so, around this time of year I’m always reminded about this running joke some of us had when I worked at The Examiner.
I was working as the Arts & Entertainment Editor (and Food and Travel and Life & Style, you get the idea), and I was laying out a page about turducken, which is chicken stuffed in a duck which is then stuffed in a turkey. I have never had it, but that’s just because it sounds horribly gross.
I wrote this headline for that story that I was particularly proud of: “Birds of a Feather Cooked Together.” And I took my printed out page to Master P (also known by me as P Biddy but known by everyone else as Peter Brown) so he could proof it for me.
Master P: “Who eats this?”
Me: “Oh, I hear [our boss] has it every year on Thanksgiving, but he stuffs the chicken with chewing tobacco first.”
Master P: “Ah yes, chewducken.”
[Side note: Our boss chewed tobacco all the time in the office. You would be sitting in a meeting with him, and he would be spitting into a cup. He also had a crazy wandering eye, which really completed the whole crazy asshole persona he had going on. I wouldn’t have been surprised to walk into his office and find his stroking a cat on his lap while he plans world domination.]
Chewducken became a running joke in the office.
“What are you eating? It smells good.”
“How was your date?”
“Really good. The restaurant was really nice. I had the chewducken.”
A few months later, this photo popped up on the Associated Press wire:
Some python thought he’d hit the jackpot and ate an alligator. I don’t remember where this happened, but I’m going to assume it was in this country: Only an American snake could be so gluttonous. Master P called me over to his cube to show me the photo.
Me: “Now, shove that thing into a turkey and I think you are on to something.”
Master P: “Mmmm, tursnaketor.”
Then tursnaketor turned into the running office joke, along with various incarnations, because everything is funny when you shove it in a turkey.
Me: “Who wants to come over for dinner tonight? I’m making turduckolsen: You take the Olsen Twins and shove them in a duck and shove that into a turkey.”
Master P: “No thanks, Sonia. We are having turlohton at my place: Turkey stuffed inside Lindsay Lohan stuffed inside Paris Hilton.”
A few years later, I was sharing this story with my friend Holly and she said, “You know if you shoved a fish inside a chicken and shoved that chicken into duck and then the duck into the turkey, you’d have turfucken.”
I was so pissed I didn’t think of that joke first.