The Sonia Show

Writer. Mocker. Beer drinker. Old movie watcher. Mother. Goober.

Parking, not

6 Comments

Yeah, so, my office in Oakland isn’t located in the best part of town. We don’t have a parking lot, which makes our parking situation scary challenging.

A few months ago, the company I work for was bought by a larger company in Minnesota. My boss made a trip to the Minnesota headquarters and held a meeting to share what he learned.

He told us about the office culture and what’s going to happen now that we have new overlords. And then he said this:

“They are located in a huge building with a massive parking lot.”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa — they have a parking lot? What’s that like?” I said, because I’m a jackass.

Everyone laughed, because – yeah – our parking situation sucks.

“I bet they can park their car knowing that it will be there when they get back,” I added. “Where’s the excitement?”

I never know what I’m going to find when I park my car. Sometimes there’s an empty cabinet filled with hypodermic needles ; sometimes there’s a creepy, child molester van or trailer parked for weeks at a time.

Lately, it’s been trash.

This trash was taking up a parking spot for almost a month.

When we would be coming back from lunch, my coworker Paul would think that was an open parking spot.

“No, you can’t park there, Paul. The trash is parked there.”

There’s also shopping carts parked around the building, filled with I don’t even want to know. I worry there’s a body in there.

This week I’ve been parking behind this:

As you can imagine, it smells awesome around our building. Let me put it this way: It smells like an episode of “Hoarders.”

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Author: The Sonia Show

I'm a writer/mocker/goober/mother in San Francisco who likes to drink beer, shop, laugh and make other people laugh, podcast, watch old movies, feed my unhealthy obsession with pop culture, kick breast cancer's ass, wear orange and root for the San Francisco Giants, participate in general jackass-ery, talk about TV, eavesdrop on strangers' conversations, make nerdy “Star Wars” and “Simpsons” references, and post personal things about myself on the web for all to read, which makes me some sort of literary exhibitionist.

6 thoughts on “Parking, not

  1. what’s super sad is that I think this is my neighborhood…sigh.

    • What’s crazy is that each block in the neighborhood is totally different. I mean, a block or two from my office to the right is Brown Sugar Kitchen, which is awesome, and a block or two to the left is the new Target.

      Also, the cops sit right outside our office and bust people for speeding or blowing through the stop sign, but the City of Oakland ignores street cleaning in the neighborhood. Lame.

  2. When I came out to your building last year, the closer I got the louder I said to myself “I must be lost, Sonia wouldn’t be working in the ghetto.” Of course, then I would go another block and it would get worse.

  3. yep, definitely my neighborhood!

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