The Sonia Show

Writer. Mocker. Beer drinker. Old movie watcher. Mother. Goober.

I would not survive The Hunger Games

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Yeah, so, I would die immediately if selected for The Hunger Games. I know this.

My sister Michelle said that she would volunteer to take my place, because I wouldn’t survive. She’s right. I probably wouldn’t last a day. She’s really good with a bow and camping and all that shit. I, on the other hand, would probably just kill myself to avoid sleeping outside on the ground.

My family is really into hunting, fishing, camping and all that outdoorsy stuff. Me? Not so much. As soon as I was old enough to stay home alone, I stopped going on family camping trips, which were practically every weekend. And, if you’re thinking I must have been having parties every weekend like a normal teenager would, then you have learned nothing from this blog. I spent the entire weekend renting movies or riding my bike to the Capri Theatre to watch “Aliens” for the 300th time. Yep, I was so wild and crazy back then.

So, yeah, my idea of roughin’ it involves staying in a hotel. It’s one of the two things about me that makes my dad wonder if I’m really his daughter. The other thing is my complete lack of direction. I get lost using a map. True story.

I have friends that insist I would like camping now, and they urge me to give it another chance. I seriously doubt it. I can handle camping if we’re staying in a cabin — a cabin with running water; a cabin that is house, really. But sleeping on the ground in a tent? I’ll pass. The only way you’ll catch me sleeping on the ground is if I pass out, which — let’s be honest — is entirely feasible.

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Author: The Sonia Show

I'm a writer/mocker/goober/mother in San Francisco who likes to drink beer, shop, laugh and make other people laugh, podcast, watch old movies, feed my unhealthy obsession with pop culture, kick breast cancer's ass, wear orange and root for the San Francisco Giants, participate in general jackass-ery, talk about TV, eavesdrop on strangers' conversations, make nerdy “Star Wars” and “Simpsons” references, and post personal things about myself on the web for all to read, which makes me some sort of literary exhibitionist.

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