The Sonia Show

Writer. Mocker. Beer drinker. Old movie watcher. Mother. Goober.

Public speaking is not my favorite


Yeah, so, last weekend I attended my last wedding of the year … I think. I mean, someone might drop a wedding invitation on me before 2013 is over, but I doubt it.

My longest friend Amanda and her good man Brock got hitched in the most fabulous 1920s-themed wedding. It was really awesome. My sister Michelle and I were bridesmaids, so we were really decked out for the theme – headbands, flapper dresses. I was worried that people wouldn’t embrace the theme, and the only ones dressed up would be the wedding party.

I was so wrong. Amanda and Brock’s people were into it. They were decked out! It was the bee’s knees. I would love to share photos with you, but the happy couple has asked us not to share photos of the wedding via social media. Maybe that’s part of the theme?

It should surprise no one to learn that mighty, mighty good man David already had a 1920s suit in his closet. Vintage clothing is one of the many things David is into. He loves that stuff, so he was right in his element.

Well … maybe I can share just one … I mean, Amanda and Brock are on a plane to Italy right now. They won’t notice, right? It’s just one little photo of me and David …

Don't ask why we're holding horses, we will never tell.

Don’t ask why we’re holding horses, we will never tell.

Hmmm, you can’t really see my super-cute headpiece in this photo. Well, I have this one photo that wasn’t actually taken at the wedding. It was taken at my parents’ house after the wedding. That doesn’t count, right?


OK, OK. I won’t share anymore photos without permission.

So, as a member of the bridal party, it was my duty to give a toast. Now, I have been in seven weddings as an adult, more than 10 weddings if you count being a flower girl as a kid. I have always whined my way out of giving a toast, but Amanda asked me to give one, and I couldn’t say no to my longest friend.

Public speaking is not my thing. Like most people, I fear public speaking more than death, but less than a room full of spiders.

I beat cancer, and I pushed a baby out of my uterus without drugs. I usually walk around feeling like there’s nothing I can’t do, but apparently that doesn’t include public speaking. Lame.

This is a stupid fear considering I’m totally fine sharing ultra-personal details about myself on this blog, and it’s available to be read by anyone for years and years, yet I can’t say a few words in front of strangers about one of my longest friends; a few words that they will totally forget about the next day unless I say something horribly offensive or racist. Offensive could happen, but not racist. That’s more my dad and/or brother’s thing.

Also, I used to go the Ronn Owens radio show on KGO-810AM every few months back when I was a TV critic. That didn’t bother me at all. It was like I was just talking to Ronn, so I didn’t feel the need to vomit before I went on the air. Now, I can barely muster up the courage to speak in our monthly marketing meeting at work in front of six people.

I’m ridiculous.

The toast was just hanging over my head for weeks. I was dreading it. I wrote the toast, and I retooled and tweaked and tinkered. I had other people read it. I really worried and fretted about this toast. I think it went pretty OK, though. I did get all choked up in the middle, which is embarrassing. While I’m all about crying about beer commercials at home, I try to keep it together in public.

Still, several people approached me after the toast to tell me how much they loved it, which is a huge relief. I didn’t want to let Amanda down or disappoint her with a crappy toast.

So, yeah, we had a great time at the wedding. Amanda and Brock have great friends. We had such a good time I think we stayed until 12:30 a.m., which is way past our bedtime. Scandalous!


Author: The Sonia Show

I'm a writer/mocker/goober/mother in San Francisco who likes to drink beer, shop, laugh and make other people laugh, podcast, watch old movies, feed my unhealthy obsession with pop culture, kick breast cancer's ass, wear orange and root for the San Francisco Giants, participate in general jackass-ery, talk about TV, eavesdrop on strangers' conversations, make nerdy “Star Wars” and “Simpsons” references, and post personal things about myself on the web for all to read, which makes me some sort of literary exhibitionist.

5 thoughts on “Public speaking is not my favorite

  1. There was no “social media” in the 20’s, hence their “no sharing” request. Now if you want to share them by wearing a sandwich board, that’s fine.

  2. I hate public speaking too. Just thinking about it gives me the shakes. I had to give the toast at my best friend’s wedding a couple years ago and I had to liquor myself up beforehand. A nine-year-old boy came up to me later and told me it was a good toast, though, so I guess I had a victory.

    I love your hairpiece!

    • Yeah, I definitely had a few drinks beforehand, but I tried to be careful not to have too many. I didn’t want to turn into a sobbing, slurring mess … until later in the evening.

      And thank you! I found it on Etsy (of course).

  3. I understand entirely your trepidation with public speaking. It is both natural and statistically common but it can be overcome. As a public speaking trainer I help people do so every day. Speaking can be a rewarding and positive experience instead of a painful one. If you are interested, you can check out my blog for free tips and insights into being a better public speaker. Keep up the great work with your outstanding blog!

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