Yeah, so, I almost burned the house down making rice. True story.
I started a pot of rice and then forgot about it. I was screwing around on my computer and completely forgot about it. I could even smell the smoke, and it still didn’t register in my brain that I was almost burning down my house.
“Someone is burning something,” I thought. “It’s really strong … One of the neighbors must be burning something. … Maybe there’s a fire nearby. … Wow! It’s starting to get smoky in here. I wonder who is burning something. … OH FUCK! IT’S ME.”
It took me an embarrassingly long time to remember that I put something on the stove and it was burning. I would love to blame it on “chemo brain,” in which you become absent-minded and easily distracted. However, I was doing crap like this before chemo. I’ve been known to start making hamburgers or put on a pot of water to boil and then wander off. Oh, and of course, there’s the time I lost the car.
Mighty, mighty good man David is usually around to help me. Whether he drives around looking for my car or quietly walks over to the stove and flips the burgers or turns down the heat on the boiling water, he saves me from doing something stupid. He’s in LA this week for work. Hopefully, there will still be a house for him to come home to.
So anyway, let’s talk about something else. Check out my awesome new shoes.