The Sonia Show

Writer. Mocker. Beer drinker. Old movie watcher. Mother. Goober.

I am so sorry, Muni. Please forgive me!

15 Comments

Yeah, so, I did something so stupid and embarrassing on Friday that I debated about whether or not I wanted to write about it, but I can’t keep secrets from you guys.

On Friday night, I met up with good buddies Tiff and DH at Epic Roasthouse. They have a really great happy hour, and we took full advantage of it, ordering many, many drinks and appetizers.

Eventually, it was time to get all our drunk asses home. We decided to hop on the Muni train, which I would ride for one stop to the Embarcadero BART station and then on to Glen Park, and they would hop out down the line to catch whatever bus they need to take them to the other side of the city.

As we got on the train, Tiff and DH swipe their clipper cards (for those who don’t live around here, clipper cards are reloadable smart cards used to pay transit fees). I, however, do not have a clipper card, but I’ve got my $2 in my hand.

Tiff and DH grab a seat.

“I’ll be right back,” I slur. “I need to go the front of the train and pay.”

“Nah, dude, you’re cool,” they said. “Just sit down.”

Me: “Oh, OK.”

At the Embarcadero station, I said my goodbyes and stumbled off the train and up the stairs, where — you probably guessed by now — a transit cop was waiting for me.

“Can I see your ticket, ma’am?”

Me: “I put my money … er, I mean … It’s just that … [sighs] I don’t have a ticket.”

Cop: “License, please.”

I was so fuckin’ embarrassed.

Really, really embarrassed.

I knew I deserved the ticket. I totally deserved it! I was so ashamed of myself. I always pay on Muni. Always. I was going to pay this time. I had the $2 in my right hand. But I didn’t pay because I was drunk, and I wanted a few more minutes to chat with my friends. This is not the first time I drank a bunch of red wine and made poor decisions. That’s pretty much all I did in my 30s. (In my 20s, it was tequila and poor decisions.)

After I signed my ticket, I grabbed it and practically ran to a BART train, hoping to get away from all the people who just saw me act like an asshole and not pay a measly $2 on Muni. Seriously, what a dick I was! I feel like maybe the ticket isn’t enough, and I need to punish myself even more. Maybe I should pay double next time I get on a train? Maybe I should pick up all the trash on the next train I get on? Maybe admitting mistakes in public and opening myself up to comments from readers calling me names is punishment enough.

So now, I have a $103 fare evasion ticket and an overwhelming feeling of shame.

Oh, and by the way, first thing Saturday morning, I went online and ordered a clipper card.

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Author: The Sonia Show

I'm a writer/mocker/goober/mother in San Francisco who likes to drink beer, shop, laugh and make other people laugh, podcast, watch old movies, feed my unhealthy obsession with pop culture, kick breast cancer's ass, wear orange and root for the San Francisco Giants, participate in general jackass-ery, talk about TV, eavesdrop on strangers' conversations, make nerdy “Star Wars” and “Simpsons” references, and post personal things about myself on the web for all to read, which makes me some sort of literary exhibitionist.

15 thoughts on “I am so sorry, Muni. Please forgive me!

  1. I hope your friends offered to split the ticket.

  2. Nah. I take full responsibility for my actions.

  3. I’ve walked out of Safeway with bottled water or cat food under the cart that the checker didn’t see and I forgot to mention. I always go back and pay. Now. Once I didn’t and I felt like crap so I paid a few days later. I always imagine if the kids were with me and act accordingly. Freakin’ kids cost me so much money!

  4. OMG the ticket is $103.00???? that is terrible, maybe 25.00 for the first time, boy no brakes for you, I love my Clipper Card by the way, I use it everyweek when I come over to babysit Calvin….

  5. Pingback: Muni fare-ducker’s public apology | Muni Diaries

  6. FOR THE RECORD: i never advocated not paying…it was ALL TIFF!

  7. Sonia, are you sure that ticket was for non-payment and not public drunkenness and urination??

  8. I was the bad influence. I absolutely was. I definitely did in fact say you were fine. And I do owe you for the ticket you accrued. Dinner on me 🙂

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